We've heard from listeners with some truly weird tales of what goes on at banks: ATM machines that screw up, incompetent financial planners sitting in some bank branches, a charge to talk to a teller, telephone lines with absolutely no access to a human.

Well, get ready for a trend you might turn out to like even less. We're starting to see banks try to "brand" themselves with new gimmicks, such as "greeters" who welcome you at the door, free magazine subscriptions, Sunday banking hours, and even game areas to keep your kids occupied.

Why are they doing this? Because there are so many banks competing for customers for a high-stakes range of products, including investments, insurance, and credit cards in addition to traditional bank accounts. They want you to have fun on their premises, so that you'll open more accounts!

Be prepared for aggressive marketing when you step into a bank. More than ever, you have to be a savvy shopper. Keep an eye out, especially for banks that keep adding on hefty fees along with their "customer-friendly" campaigns. -This seemed a little out of place. Started out talking about fees then went into marketing campaigns, then back to fees again. Maybe condense and stick at the end, when they address competing over new customers again?

Since 1945, fees have raised from 35% to 50% of banks' income, according to R. K. Hammer Investment Bankers, a financial services consultant in Thousand Oaks, California. We're talking fees for cash transfers, bounced checks, balances below a certain level, ATM transactions, dormant accounts, money orders, stopped checks, lost safe-deposit keys - and more.

Many bank clients (meaning you and us!) don't even know this so-called "fee creep" is going on, but we're here to not only tell you that you can fight fee creep, we're here to show you how.

Six Ways to Fight "Fee Creep"

What is fee creep? It's that sneaky practice of slipping in account fees this month that weren't there last month. Your bank will, as a display of good customer communication practices, send you a letter warning that it is introducing a new fee or raising an existing one, all part of the price of "serving you better." These creeping fees can cut into your balance like crabgrass on your lawn. Watch out for these trends, all sure signs of fee creep:

Trend #1: Your bank starts charging a dollar or so to deposit money into your account and another dollar or so to withdraw money. Are you kidding? There might also be a small fee for talking with a teller at the window. And you thought the teller was just doing her job! More widespread, however, is the fee for the convenience of using an ATM.

What to do: If there is a bank in your area that doesn't impose ATM fees, start by taking your business there. They do exist. Check www.bankrate.com for Bankrate's list of banks with surcharge-free ATMs around the country. And write a letter to the manager of the bank you're leaving explaining that the fees are what drove you away.

We're not crazy about ATMs anyway, but especially avoid using another bank's ATM. Our friends at Bankrate.com estimated that Americans paid more than $4 billion in 2005 [update?] for withdrawal fees when using ATMs not owned by their bank.

They'll "surcharge" you $2.50 or more per transaction. It's a convenience when you're traveling, but make sure you withdraw larger sums to get your money's worth, since each transaction will cost the same. Look at it this way: If you get into the habit of withdrawing $50 from the corner ATM twice a week and you pay a surcharge of $2 or more each time, you'll lose $208 a year in fees for this little convenience. No thanks!

Read the ATM screen carefully. Banks are required to disclose their surcharges. And stay away from ATMs in high-traffic areas such as hotels, airports or casinos. The surcharges there are often even higher than those at banks. A $3 or $4 charge on a transaction is not unheard of in some states.

Trend #2: Your bank is eager to spare you the horror of bouncing a check (aren't they nice?), so they offer you overdraft checking privileges, a permanent line of credit. The bank will automatically cover your checks up to a certain amount even if you don't have the funds in your account. But wait: You'll have to pay back the "loan" with interest. Some banks charge $20 to $25 or even more for an overdraft check, which costs the bank only a dollar or two to process!

What to do: Don't you think that a 2,000% profit is too much? We do. To avoid overdraft charges:

1. Know your bank's clearing schedule.
2. Never write a check for more than your balance.
3. If you're not sure a check will clear, check your balance first.
4. Just say "no" to overdraft protection.

Trend #3: The bank could charge you as much as $25 or more for every 200 new checks. Those nice checks with your name and address come in your choice of colors or, for a premium fee, an image of an idyllic landscape or Elvis in his prime. They're a major profit maker for the bank.

Two problems: One, more and more people are paying their bills online, so they're not using checks much anymore. And two, if you do send a check, do you think your long-distance provider and the bank that receives your mortgage payments (maybe the same bank that issues the checks) appreciate the pretty pictures you send them each month?

What to do: Save a few bucks, for heaven's sake. You don't have to buy your checks from the bank. Order personalized checks from Checks In The Mail (800-733-4443; www.citm.com), or from Checks Unlimited (800-210-0468; www.checksunlimited.com). These companies issue personalized checks, with a choice of designs, at about half the price of most banks.

Trend #4: When the prime lending rate goes down, the first thing to suffer is your savings account. Your bank will never tell you how thrilled they are that they can use your money and pay you such a low interest rate. Many banks keep the rate excessively low to "encourage" you to invest in annuities and mutual funds.

What to do: Roll the money into a money market mutual fund. You'll nearly double the rate of return without sacrificing liquidity. [Will they recommend a money market fund? Could tease the rec if they do.]

Trend #5: Banks make a lot of money in penalties and fees if your checking account drops below the minimum amount that you must keep in the account. And they waive check charges only on accounts with large balances.

What to do: Although few banks will volunteer this information, you can ask and see if your bank will allow you to combine your checking, savings, and money market balances to meet the required minimum. Ask!

If you have an interest-bearing account, ask your bank to calculate the interest in the way that is best for you—from day of deposit to day of withdrawal, compounded daily.

And find out if the interest is "tiered." Many banks offer a higher rate of interest if your balance goes above a certain floor.

What, they didn't tell you?! Guess they were just too busy dreaming up new ways to serve you better at a price.

Trend #6: Many banks don't adequately explain all the important details relating to their credit cards. Many use misleading advertising and complicated new account forms to confuse you.

What to do: Ask these questions before you sign up:

1. Is there a low introductory rate if I sign up? How long does it last? What is the rate after that?
2. What is the grace period for my payments?
3. Can I transfer balances from other cards?
4. What services come with the card? Some services you might expect are car rental insurance; a free safe-deposit box; free checking if you are a senior citizen, disabled, or have a mortgage, car loan, or certificate of deposit at the same bank.
5. What is my liability if the card is lost or stolen? Is there a toll-free emergency phone number to call?

At all times, however, open all of the mailings from your credit card company and watch out for "Changes to our Agreement." Read all of the fine print. Credit card issuers have a nasty habit of getting you in, then shortening the grace period or upping the ante on late fees. Be prepared to say goodbye and look for a better deal if your issuer changes terms.

The Bottom Line

Decide what kinds of banking services you need and shop around for the banks that best suit those needs. You don't have to stick close to home anymore now that online banking has come of age. Go to Bankrate.com for comparisons of banks around the country.

If you are interested in learning more about online banking, check out www.onlinebankingreport.com, which provides research, data and insights to the burgeoning online banking industry.

If you are considering a new bank, ask for a list of all possible fees. Then see if you can negotiate to lower some of those fees. You may be surprised at how flexible a new bank can be.

Until all banks merge into one global giant, there is still competition for new customers. Use that to your advantage!